13th wheel

Moving from Athens, a town full of people my age, to Thomasville, a town full of no one my age, to Wilmore, a town full of people my age who are all married, has been an interesting adjustment. While I have met some great people here, one of the coolest people and a guy who I can relate to the most is someone I met at our New Student Orientation last fall. He's a great guy from Indy who shares a lot of the same experiences and passions that I do. And as with most people here, he's married to an incredible girl.

On Friday night, Jeremy and Jessica had some friends over for a little party/get-together/send-off before they left town for the coming month. As I got off work and started to think about heading over to their place, I really began to realize that the chances were pretty great that I'd be the only single person around. Now I have to admit that of all my friends who are married, I believe I can honestly say that Jeremy and Jessica create the most welcoming and comfortable environment in which I don't feel like the obvious "single guy."

Still, we all know how the "3rd wheel" syndrome works. Reality is that it is sometimes awkward for a single person when hanging out with several other couples. So I began to consider not showing up and just sending them a message before they left.

Within a few moments of considering bailing out, I immediately heard myself telling friends and guys that I've discipled in the past that life is ultimately a matter of perspective. And choosing to have a positive perspective which isn't completely self-centered is possible, even though it at times can be difficult. So I decided to trust in my own advice and believe that hanging out with Jeremy and Jessica and some other equally great people wouldn't be awkward enough to prevent me from going.

I am so glad that I did!

The night was not only a great time of fellowship, conversations, an intensely hilarious game, and meeting new people, but it was also a wonderful time for me to feel alive again here in Wilmore. We (meaning myself and 5 other couples) were all able to pray over Jeremy and Jessica before they leave to return to Uganda. The night was such a blessing to them and I believe it was a blessing to everyone who was there. But I was especially blessed by my friendship with them and the life-giving experience of the night. It was just one of those nights when, as I walked home, I thought to myself, "Jesus, it's so good to be alive and surrounded by your children."

I continue to hope for the day when I can go to these events with my wife, but until that day comes, I will try to choose interaction over isolation and not give in to the fear of the "3rd wheel" syndrome. May you all find life in those around you, regardless of their stage of life. And may you all have the grace to walk in a Godly perspective everyday instead of a self-centered, prideful one.

P.S. Going to a wedding tonight with a total of 5 single guys didn't help the cause. Still, God is faithful.

P.S.S. Father, I ask that the prayers lifted up over Jeremy and Jessica last night continue to be the prayers of my heart and that you protect them, provide for them, and reveal your Kingdom to them in deeper ways daily. I thank you for Jessica and Jeremy and look forward many more raquetball games with Zerkle.